Michelle's Front Page

Silver lining

April 16th, 2006

A woman on the yahoo Guatemala adoption list serve sent out an email a couple of weeks ago talking about the silver lining she found while doing her paperchase. She said that she was so grateful to hear all of the wonderful things her friends had to say in her reference letters because most people don’t get to hear those kinds of things because they are only spoken during eulogies. I thought it was a lovely sentiment and today I received my silver lining.

Deanna and I have been friends for 22 years (yes it makes me shudder to say that…we are getting old!). We met in the 7th grade during study hall. We spent many years in junior high and high school getting in trouble for talking and giggling. We traveled abroad together for the first and second time. We began college together. We’ve gotten drunk together, vacationed together, lived together, eaten A LOT of junk food together, deceived our parents together, commiserated over men (or lack there of) and jobs together, watched each other graduate and get married. There have been some small stretches where we haven’t talked – either because we got busy or one time because she got mad at me and stopped speaking to me for 6 months but forgot to tell me. But mostly, we’ve laughed together. We’ve laughed to the point of tears more times than I could even begin to recall. We try to tell our husbands our funny stories to let them into our twisted little world but we usually end up laughing too hard to finish. She has been a constant anchor in my life for almost as long as I can remember.

Tonight, she emailed me the reference letter she wrote for us for our home study. I can’t even begin to express how wonderful it was to hear all of the amazing things this amazing woman had to say about me (and Steve). It made me cry. Hard. Thank you Deanna and I love you!

There have also been a couple of other silver linings already in this process. An old friend sent the link for my blog to another old friend. Vi, my old boss from Big Brothers Big Sisters, checked in to say hello. I haven’t heard from her in many years and it was wonderful to hear from her. She is one of the coolest ladies I have ever known – and has the coolest kids (adults now). She is also responsible for my pottery addiction. Vi, Steve thanks you for that (somewhat sarcastically).

Also my wonderful friend Amy has been checking in (and posting some hysterical and touching comments). Amy and I worked together for several years in a domestic violence shelter/drug and alcohol halfway house. We got along so well because we both had incredible passion for the work we were doing, both had incredible disdain for those who those who stood in the way of our good work (she once called a lawyer, in court, a bureaucratic whore – she’s my hero), and both had rather dry and twisted senses of humor as our primary coping mechanisms. Amy and I have both “sold out” and become bureaucrats because fighting the good fight doesn’t pay the bills. That coupled with the fact that Amy is a mom these days leaves us few chances to catch up with each other. Amy, I love reading your comments and receiving your advice – you are an amazing woman! (Although, I did see the list you made Miss Amy – are we being a little co-dependent and enabling my list making addiction?)

And finally, my blog has allowed me to connect with others going through this adoption struggle and enjoy their blogs. There are an awful lot of kick ass women out there! I am going to attempt to remember all of these silver linings when I get frustrated and start to curse this process. Thank you all!

This entry was posted on Sunday, April 16th, 2006 at 9:53 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

One Response to “Silver lining”

  1. Myron Gainsbrough Says:

    Sometimes we all need a break… try not to get too frustrated!

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